One of the hardest things in life is to figure out exactly what we want. This sounds simple, but it is a complex concept. In fact, most people live their lives based on what they don’t want because recognizing the pain of one’s current reality is easier than imagining the joy of what could be. This leads to simply avoiding unpleasant things and settling for easy alternatives, which results in short term comfort and long term dissatisfaction.
What we want is usually clouded by what others want, what is expected of us, what is easy, social media, society, family, and negative self talk. Some examples might include things like becoming a lawyer, earning lots of money, being a partner in a large law firm, having our name appear first on the firm letterhead, wearing a $3,000 suite or handbag, driving a $100,000 car, having a certain house in a certain neighborhood. There is nothing wrong with these things unless they conflict with who you really are and the things that are truly important to you.
I admit that I wanted some of those things, but after several years I realized that they were not the things I truly wanted. I wanted to be healthy, to have more free time, flexibility, financial security, control over my work and my environment, and work mobility. I realized I could never have those things working for someone else, which is the single biggest reason I started my own law firm.
I am not against working for someone else, but doing so should align with your short term and long term priorities. You should know why you are working for someone else and how that will translate into living and achieving your true priorities.
Life works out better when we identify our true priorities and set our compass in that direction, so that our decisions and actions move us along our path, and not the paths that are meant for others.
If you are a new lawyer (or soon to be), I suggest you identify those things in the law that you don’t like. For me, I did not like being subject to the court’s calendar or opposing counsel’s last minute filings. I did not want my work to be filled with conflict and negativity. I did not want to deal with the government (courts, district attorney offices, cities, counties, the IRS). I did not want to be subject to billable hour requirements. This helped me to eliminate a huge swath of the law and many career paths.
Then I could focus on what I did want. I wanted to work with business owners. I wanted to help clients achieve their business goals and avoid pitfalls. I wanted to make my own schedule. I wanted to make money based on my own efforts and merits. I wanted to have many sources of income (many clients) that would provide me with more financial security than if I only had one (a job).
All of this led me to starting my own firm as a business lawyer. From there I could focus on evolving my law practice to achieve my higher order priorities, flexibility, mobility, financial independence, etc.
Spend some time writing down what you want (and don’t want). You will be surprised how this process will forecast your future. Then set your compass in that direction and get to work on making your priorities your reality.